Spend it like cash! Then where's my change?

STAPLES, the ubiquitous office supplies store, sends me a "rewards" coupon. It reads, "Spend it like cash!" on its face. It is for $12.00. I picked up a $7.99 box of envelopes. I tendered my coupon. The clerk said, "You have to buy something else. You can't get change." And I said, "But that is not how I spend cash."

I had no desire to argue with anyone about this. I had no need to be correct. I just needed to utter the phrase "But that is not how I spend cash" to show that I have not completely given up on logic. If I had a 12 dollar bill and the item cost less than $12.00, I would get change.

Now I have a STAPLES gift card with $2.77 credit on it. (I donated $1.00 to a charity at the pointof purchase.) This card is going to get a billion frequent traveler miles riding in my wallet for 6 months until I remember to use it. AHHHHHHHHH! I don't want the card or the store credit. I want my $2.77 so I can go pay for a medium coffee (aka a "Venti") next door.



What would you do?

Final Destination 3

If you use the word "final" in your title, there should be no sequel. Does Europe have another single titled "The Other Final Countdown"? Do they play another game after the final four? What more is there to say?

Flies in the face of logic...

Slip and fall client: Unlike other people, if I don't work, I do not get paid.

Me: So, you missed two weeks from work. How much would you have earned in those 2 weeks?

Slip and fall client: I can't say. I work nine hours a day.

Me: So, you would have worked 45 hours a week, so you missed 90 hours?

Slip and fall client: Well, I took some sick time, and then I took vacation time, because what if I got sick later in the year?

Me: Were you paid for the sick time and the vacation time?

Slip and fall client: Yes.

Me: So you didn't work for those two weeks, but you got paid?